The Rain in Spain

Tired. So tired. My body refuses to do anything. However, I am typing, and on a strange, foreign keyboard, at that. No, I don´t suppose that will be an excuse for my poor spelling. but if the grammar sucks, too, at least you kind of know why.

So here I am in Spain. It´s 16:14 here (and the colons and the parenthesis are on the wrong keys) (and that´s an accent, not an apostrophe, but I don´t care) But I don´t know what that means. It´s 10:05 where my homeland is. I would be in Theology or Chem right now, I cannot remember which. Obviously neither is important to me.

I´m already sucking profoundly at the speaking of the language. Currently I have the advantage of blaming it on my fatigue (God knows I only slept about an hour total on all the plane rides... and that I went to bed at 4:30 last night. Fuck, where are the hyphens?) But come tomorrow I´m not sure what my excuse will be.

Okay, just because it´s bothering me, I´m going to tell you people exactly where all the keystrokes are. Here is the result of shift when you hit the number keys simultaneously:!"·$%&/()= Yep, that´s one through zero. Then look what happens if I try to make a question mark- :.... and the semicolon:Ñ and basically I cannot fuction with this keyboard. ç. that is what I get instead of enter.

Here I am complaining about the keyboard. No one gives a rat´s flying ass about the keyboard. Spain is, if you´re wondering, maravilloso. I´m just tired as fuck. The weather is a bit foul... well I say foul, but I mean Clevelandy. You know, 10 degrees with rain and fog. Not the greatest day for a parade. But life goes on.

I´m literally about to pass out. Since 11:30 Tuesday morning, I have gotten maybe 4, 4.5 hours of sleep. That´means I´ve slept... I don´t know. Fucking time change.

I´m taking a nap. I think it´s 4 o´clock here. not sure though.

Nothing Changes on New Year's Day

It's true though. As Sean so wisely told me, all that really happens is a number changes. How do we really know the begining and end point of the earth's rotation- the point where it has gone in one full circle. We can't be sure, scientists don't know these things. I could celebrate the Earth spinning right now. Or now. Or whenever I want. Today is nothing but a number.

I am very full of teen angst right now, in case you haven't noticed. It's that whole idea of knowing what you want out of life. Yeah, that factor is majorly lacking. However, I know of one thing that I want to see resolved, and it's all that's keeping me going right now. Smeriously, right now I'm living my life for other people because there's nothing worth living for myself.

Today was such a shitty day. I don't mean event-wise. I mean weather-wise. It's gross out there. It's raining on and off, there isn't even a hint of snow anywhere, not even in huge piles at the mall, everything is dripping wet, and it feels like that March thaw we always get in March. What a dumb statement, I'm leaving it, though. But really, it's like that thaw, where everythign is dripping and shedding its winter skin, giving you the illusion that all will soon be bright and sunny, but you know that just when you're bracing yourself for sunscreen and beach towels, the sky will green over, a foot or so of snow will deposit upon us, and depression will sink in again. Though truthfully, this weather depresses me more than snow ever could. I love snow. Long time.

I'm such a bad person. Some times I can't stand my own friends. Usually specifial ones, though. No wonder I feel so alone. I don't want to be with half the people who could hang out right now.

Ah, well. I still love Elise, my darling lovely soul sistah.

On the bright side, I'm getting away from this hell... I mean, Ohio... in three days.