Ugh. I wish I wasn't still in GRADE SCHOOL sometimes. Okay, I'm a senior in HIgh School. So why do I feel like I'm with a group of seventh graders like the ones who visited our awful school today? People act so immature... and suck you into acting immature, too. So you look, sound, and most improtantly feel like an ass.
It's horrid when you're torn between knowing that your actions were immature and thoughtless and yet at the same time not actually feeling guilt for their repurcussions.
It's sort of like, "I'm sorry you caught me, I'm not sorry I did it". Okay, whatever. Talking behind people's backs. Um, excuse me, just because it's wrong doesn't mean that we don't realize that every single person does it. Hello, it's High School. We don't even have to go to the same school to talk about people. People talk about me- hell, I know what half of them say. I don't even care, because I'm reminding myself that I can't please everyone. And that it is unhealthy to try to please everyone. Just like it is unhealthy to spend every waking moment with a person, or to shy away from the inevitabiliy of life.
Alright so I did it. I'm not proud of it. But that doesn't necessarily mean that what was said was untrue. Just because you think that you're almighty and can do no wrong, doesn't mean you're right about that. I'm going to hell, I don't care. That's where the party will be.
I can't even seem to connect coherent thoughts together. All I can think about is how stupid this is. And how the only reason I care is because I feel like an awful person for not actually caring. There's actually only one person I am sort of worried about right now, and I'll work on that later. For now, it's a quarter past one am,a nd I have freaking soccer tomorrow.
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